Heavy heart

I have a heavy heart tonight.  My twins came home from school today in wonderful moods.  We had a normal evening and everything went well.  I had the pleasure of rocking Carter to sleep tonight.  I rarely do that because the books tell you that you're not supposed to.  You should put them in their cribs drowsy but not asleep so they can learn to fall asleep on their own.  However, rocking him to sleep every now and then won't spoil him rotten.  Tonight I took the time to hold him while he slept.  I was overwhelmed with gratitude for him and his sister.  I love them so much.

But my heart was heavy because my girlfriend Andrea is watching her precious twins fight for their lives.  They were born on Saturday at the way too early age of 25 weeks, 3 days gestation.  I kept thinking "how did I get so lucky that my twins were born healthy and hers were born so weak?"  I can't imagine the pain she is experiencing right now, not knowing if her babies will survive each night. 

So while I was rocking my sleeping baby, I kept asking God to bless Andrea like he has blessed me.  I asked him to have mercy on those two sweet babies and to give them what they need to survive and thrive.  No child deserves to go through the hardships they are enduring right now.  I know God loves those two babies, but I can't help but wonder why this is happening.

The former president of my company has a saying that if money can fix your problem, then it's not really a problem.  I think that's true.  Unfortunately money can't save these two lives.  There is nothing Andrea or her husband can do to intervene and affect the outcome.  They have to just wait and see what is in store.

I need to learn to accept the tough stuff in life and to not question God or his power in the situation.   It's such a tough pill to swallow.

Lord...please save Kennedy and Drake.